Saying the blessing and surving day 2 drop off

So we survived the first day of school and the 2nd day drop off:

He told us he waited for everyone to get their lunch yesterday and asked who would say the blessing when they told him there was not enough time…he got upset. So Daddy told him he could say his own right when he sat down. I think that made him feel better but I was proud of him for being concerned.
He was VERY tired and VERY hungry when we got home.

Today I walked him to the hallway and told him he needed to enter kindergarten hallway all by himself and find his classroom.....he kissed me and then hugged me and then kissed me 2 or 3 more times...then he headed off and disappeared. I thought for a moment that I would go check on him...WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY did I do that??? Cause when I turned to peak he was just standing there looking around like he did not know where to go...AHHHHHHHHHHHH I started to get choked up and he spotted me.Right about that time a safety patrol came up to him and asked him his classroom # and he could barely get it out in a whisper...UGHHHHHHHHHHHHH I stood there and watched him walk down the hallway and he turned to see if I was there like 2 more times...TODAY WAS HARDER THAN YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I was about to cry when I sat down at my desk this morning when a good friend had sent me this devotional and it was waiting for me in my inbox thank you GOD for awesome friends that pray:

: Today is Olivia's first day of first grade. For some reason, this seems to be harder for me than even kindergarten. Kindergarten still seemed set apart and safe. First grade is 'real' school.

Could someone please tell me how I could rush my child to the hospital after a seizure with perfect peace in my heart but the first day of school ties my stomach in knots? This is a big day of letting go for me, I guess.

There are just certain things which will be inevitable once she's in 'real' school. Somewhere along the way, I know she will get teased about something. And there will always be a skinned knee or bumped head without Momma there to comfort her. These days there are plenty of opportunities to worry when sending kids off to school.

But the Word says that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8), so I can know that the same God who cared for her in that hospital room goes with her to this school. Instead of praying that she will never get teased, I will ask God instead to teach her how to bless those who persecute her. (Matthew 5:44) Instead of asking God to make it perfect for her, I will ask Him to go with her and be her Comforter when things don't go perfectly. (2 Corinthians 1:3) I must not lose focus and forget that suffering ultimately produces a hope in God that will never fail. (Romans 5:3-5) There is no easy road into the Kingdom (Acts 14:22), even for this child of mine.

Letting go is difficult, but God's grace is sufficient. (2 Corinthians 12:9) I must remember as a momma to take up my cross DAILY and follow Him. (Luke
9:23) Just because I surrendered my daughter to Him yesterday doesn't mean I won't have to do it all over again today. But that's okay, because I can do everything through him who gives me strength (Philippians 4:7)- even this.

Father, thank You for Your faithfulness to me. Thank You that I can trust you in all things. Teach me how to surrender those things which are most dear to me, and give me Your peace again as I take up my cross once more to follow You this day.